shikisha | Cerealia Inbox

[ WHO THE HELL WOULD SEND HER SOMETHING LIKE THIS?!

Nonon just stares incredulously at it at first, before daring to actually look through it. Sure there's things in there she's thought about--WAIT A SECOND. WHY IS SHE LOOKING AT THIS AT ALL?! IT'S BEING SLAM DUNKED INTO THE GARBAGE WHERE IT BELONGS. ]

If I find out whoever sent this I'm going to beat them within one cent of their miserable life!!

[ This time it's an actual text to her CereVice. ]

I forgot to add my name. Did you receive the package, Nonon-chan?

..What the hell are you talking about?

I sent you a catalogue and a voucher. If you didn't receive it, I'll have to send another one.

[ Putting two and two together.... ]

YOU SENT THAT TO ME?! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU WERE DOING?!

I'm doing my duty as an adult and making sure you and Ryuko-chan have all the information available to you!

[ And nothing at all about messing with Nonon! ]

[ Nonon is fuming. Also super embarrassed, because she's not had sex with Ryuko at all. ]

I DIDN'T ASK FOR ANY INFORMATION FROM YOU!! KEEP YOUR PERVERTNESS TO YOURSELF!

Edited 2015-11-23 17:10 (UTC)

I figured by the time you ask me for advice, you'd have ended up seriously hurting Ryuko-chan. Intimacy can be harder than it sounds, you know! There's also nothing perverted about romance!

I don't need advice, and that idiot is fine, we're not doing anything like that!!

[ Oops, she didn't mean to out herself there. ]

Just stay out of my love life!!

Yet!

And I can't do that until I know you know what you're doing!

I'm not going to tell you what she and I are doing! That's none of your business!
I wouldn't even tell my real mother that!

Do you tell your real mother anything, though?

But at least you're accepting me as your fake mother!

...Of course not.

[ Because she's a teenaged girl, and because she is literally trying to overthrow the world's strongest company and doesn't need her mom deciding to side with Ragyo. ]

I never said that!!

It's okay, Nonon-chan. I understand completely!

It can be tough to talk to other people about this, but sex ed is an indispensable part of a high school education! I'll forward you some resources.

And keep the voucher! I paid for it with real credits, you know!

Even if I thought of you like that why the hell would I want to talk to you about sex?! We're not even doing anything like that, so just forget it!!

Do you not want to do anything like that? I bet Ryuko-chan doesn't know that.

[ This is stupid, and embarrassing, why is she even taking about this stuff with Nanoha of all people?! ]

Of course I do!

[ Because Magical Mom has good advice to give! ]

Then you need to have things right for when the time comes! You're 18 right? When I was 19, I had already adopted my daughter, so it's never too early to start learning!

UGH! I don't need to know about your sex life with your wife!!

I'm not going to tell you about that! Jeez, Nonon-chan. How rude.

But I wanted you to know that this sort of thing happens more quickly than you think, and knowledge is power!

I DIDN'T ASK BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO KNOW

[ She's going to burst soon. But not in like a sexual way. ]

I don't need you to tell me that!!

That it flusters you so much is clearly proof that you do need someone to tell you that!

I'M NOT FLUSTERED!!

Is that why you're using all-caps and multiple exclamation marks?

IT'S CALLED BEING PISSED OFF!!

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